The Weddings Part IX

Hopetown, Bahamas

October 23

Jennifer and Jessica wore coastal clothes.  The wedding went downhill unexpectedly.  It was located at Harbour Lodge.

First, the bride’s mother refused to come even though the couple wanted her to.  She disapproved of their interracial relationship.  The groom was Afro-Bahamian and the bride was white European-Bahamian.  Second, the groom’s parents fought over stupid little things such as wearing the wrong shoes and stains on clothes.  Thirdly, some of the bridesmaids wore terrible makeup and hairstyles.  During the photo shoot, the sun was in the way.  Five wild monkeys photobombed and scampered off. Unfortunately, one of Jessica’s cameras malfunctioned.  The monkeys worsened the situation by destroying the ice sculpture of the couple at the flowered altar.

At the reception under the tent, the wrong cake arrived. It was supposed to be yellow, green, and blue with white icing and berries, not buttered pound without icing and berries. Due to lack of staff, some of the guests didn’t get to eat the Bahamian cuisine and those who did had food poisoning.  The groom’s sister was in a drunken rage, the band never showed up, and inappropriate music was played by the bride’s friends.

Needless to say, it was the worst wedding ever.  Jennifer titled it on her article.

The next day, she and Jessica took a ferry dock to the Marsh Harbour Airport. By the time they arrived, they realized their flight to Argentina was delayed due to mechanical problems.

“Oh, f—! Are you f—–‘ kidding me!? We’re gonna miss the deadline!” said Jennifer.

“If the flight gets cancelled, can Naomi extend the deadline or send us to another wedding or something?” asked Jessica.

“Are you kidding me?! She does not extend deadlines! She thinks it’s a waste of time!” exclaimed Jennifer.

“Ok, seriously, you need to calm down. This is not a big deal,” said Jessica.

Jennifer mellowed down and apologized.

To keep their minds off of the flight delay, she and Jessica laughed about the awful wedding and brushed up their Spanish language skills via online resources.  They were extremely pleased when it was announced that the flight’s mechanical problems were solved.  Much to their relief, they’ll be in Buenos Aires in time.



Buenos Aires, Argentina

October 25

At the Plaza Hotel, a young Argentinian couple, 30-year-old Javier Vasquez and 27-year-old Sofia Delgado prepared for their Catholic church wedding.  They both had slick black hair.  Javier’s was short-cropped and Sofia’s was a little long, its size is similar to Rapunzel’s. At first, they hated each other because of their annoying habits.  Then, they grew on each other  after one magical night at a park.

At the church, Javier wore a black suit with a blue tie and Sofia wore a long white dress. Her head was covered with a veil that was long as a snake.  She wore a blue petticoat underneath her dress and several garters.  Her jewelry was silver emeralds.  Javier’s mother walked him down the aisle before Sofia walked down with her father.  She carried a bouquet of Amazonian flowers.

Javier’s mother whispered to him, “Usted puede ser mi único hijo, pero estoy muy orgulloso de ti. Y te amo. Estoy ganando una hija. Voy a patear el culo si te rompe el corazón. (You may be my only son, but I’m so proud of you. And I love you. I’m gaining a daughter. I’ll kick her a– if she breaks your heart).”

“¡Mama, por favor!” exclaimed Javier. “Ella es una mujer maravillosa. (She is a wonderful woman).

“Claro que si,” said Mrs. Vasquez

Meanwhile, Sofia’s father whispered to her, “¡Mejor que se ocupará de ti o te parto sus huesos! (He better take care of you or I’ll break his bones!)”

“¡Papa, por favor! Él es un buen hombre. (He is a good man),” said Sofia.

“Yo sé eso. Estoy preocupado por ti. Te quiero, hija. (I know that. I’m just worried about you. I love you, daughter),” said the father.

“Yo también te quiero, papá. (I love you too, papa),” said Sofia.

Prior to the wedding, Diego’s mother and Sofia’s parents gave the couple their blessing. Families and friends dedicated their songs and poems to the couple. It was not customary for bridesmaids to be there, although there was a ring bearer and a flower girl.

After the wedding, Jessica took pictures of the couple and the wedding entourage at the garden. While writing about the wedding, Jennifer’s mind wandered to Robbie.

The reception began at 8 p.m. at Sofia’s parents’ large house. The buffet consisted of delicate sandwiches with varied ingredients including local specialties of fine fish and special meats such as prosciutto.

In the living room, there was a little game. Several ribbons, with hidden trinkets at one end, were attached to the Rogel cake.  All of the single girls pulled a ribbon each and the woman  who was found holding a ribbon with a ring at the other end was deemed to be the next bride-to-be. Jennifer caught a ribbon with a ring.  She didn’t believe that myth.

Afterwards, there was the cake cutting ceremony. The Rogel cake was wedged between layers of crispy, paper-thin pastry. Layer upon layer was piled up until the centrepiece, a final top layer of decadent whipped Italian meringue.

The newlywed’s first dance was the tango. Some people made toasts to the couple, using champagne or sidra, a very popular local cider. People danced and sang songs in Spanish and played horse-riding games. Sofia held a bridal garter game and gave those away to her single girlfriends.

As the couple walked out, guests threw rice and birdseed at them carefully.  They waved goodbye at the newlyweds as they climbed on a black Harley motorcycle.  A sign, “Recién Casado” was on the back. ZOOM! Off they went like the wind!

Jennifer and Jessica departed.  “Our work is done.”

“Finally!” exclaimed Jennifer.

At their hotel, they emailed the Argentina piece to Naomi and headed down to the bar to have a drink.

“If this gets printed on the magazine, do you think people will like them or hate them?” asked Jessica.

“I wouldn’t sleep on it too much,” said Jennifer.

They made a toast of finishing the assignment.




October 26

The travelling duo entered Naomi’s office at Global Travel Magazine.  She was not there. They rummaged through her things.  Inside the top drawer of Naomi’s desk, Jessica found a document proving that the lawsuit  over the cliff photos was a hoax. She used photoshop to create those cliff pictures. No one was fired for framing Jessica. Naomi was testing Jessica to see how well she can handle this type of situation since she was a temp.  Jessica was extremely outraged.

Moreover, Jennifer discovered a blue folder labeled J&J in the file drawer. She was extremely indignant when she discovered that Naomi planned to take the credit for their work. Jessica showed Jennifer the fake lawsuit document. That boiled Jennifer’s blood.

“Why would she do this?” asked Jessica.

“Because she is a sociopath! She has gone too far!” exclaimed Jennifer. She showed her partner the blue folder.

“Oh my god,” said Jessica. “She can’t do that!”

“Yes, I can,” boomed a familiar voice.

That startled Jennifer and Jessica. It was none other than Naomi herself.

“You greedy manipulative b—-!” said Jennifer, slamming the document on the desk. She walked closer to Naomi. Naomi didn’t flinch.

“Is that a way to greet your beloved boss?” said Naomi, taking her seat at her desk.

Jessica moved out of Naomi’s way. Jennifer secretly recorded the conversation with her audio digital recorder.

Beloved, indeed! thought Jessica.

“Do you always test temps with fake lawsuits?” asked Jessica. “Or am I the only victim?”

“I always test temps or newbies to see how well they can handle situations like that. The fake lawsuit was part of the bet. I was actually surprised when you passed,” said Naomi. “As  for the weddings, I underestimated you two. Great job!” She said “great job” sarcastically.

Slacker! thought Jennifer.

Naomi pulled out two paychecks from her purse and wrote down figures. “Speaking of which, York, I thought the Williamsburg article was exaggerated. You think I’m stupid? So, once the story gets printed under MY name, written and edited by ME, the Board of Directors of the European Journalism Centre will see ME as the hard worker instead of the pathetic social climber, the dragon lady, the wicked witch they think I am. I might become chairwoman of EJC.” She had been planning to take someone else’s story since last year and couldn’t decide who.  “The Weddings” story was valuable.

She each handed Jennifer and Jessica their paychecks of 3,000 pounds.  Jessica’s eyes opened widely.  She sat down on the couch.

“Is that what this is all about? To earn the board’s respect? To gain a better reputation? What the f— is wrong with you? You think of nobody but yourself! You won’t get away with this!” snapped Jennifer.

“How are you going to stop me?” asked Naomi.

“I’ll keep this quiet if you give me your job or we’ll tell the EJC about your crimes,” said Jennifer.

“How dare you blackmail me!” exclaimed Naomi.

Jennifer pulled her audio digital recorder out of her jeans pocket and played Naomi’s confession. Naomi was horrified.

“So, what’s it gonna be? Take it or leave it,” said Jennifer.

Naomi contemplated her decision for a few seconds. “Congratulations, Ms. York, you’re the new owner of Global Travel Magazine.”

Jennifer was grateful.

“YES!” exclaimed Jessica. “Bye, bye, dragon lady. You can kiss my a–, or what y’all say…” She mooned at Naomi. “A—!”  Jennifer laughed.  Naomi was disgusted.

One second later, Naomi announced to everyone that Jennifer was the new owner of Global Travel Magazine.  After Naomi packed her things and left, everyone cheered.  Seemed like that she wasn’t universally loved.  Jennifer pulled off a party in the conference room. Brian asked himself, “What’s Naomi’s next step? Ahhh, who cares? F— that b—-!” He helped himself with champagne and made a toast with Jennifer and Jessica.  He apologized to them about the bet.  Jennifer and Jessica eventually forgave him.  Brian excused him to the loo.

“The Wicked Witch of the West has left the building,” said Jessica.

“Jessica, as my first duty as boss, I’m offering you a job as my co-publisher permanently,” said Jennifer.

“Are you kidding?!” exclaimed Jessica. “That’s a great opportunity. I…I don’t know what to say. I’m speechless.”

“You wanna sleep on it?” asked Jennifer. ” I mean, the move from America to England is a big transition. A huge adjustment. Unless there are other job offers on the line.”

Jessica said she will think about it. “So, what do we do now?”

“After we publish ‘The Weddings’ in four days, we’ll spend our hard-earned paychecks on our ‘honeymoon,” suggested Jennifer. She air quoted on the word honeymoon. “If you like.” 

Jessica was delighted at that idea.





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